im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Randomize
