But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
