Christians are straight up FREAKS
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
