Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
