do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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