If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
There r osticjed everywhere
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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