i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
