Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
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