Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
