apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize