Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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