you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
