and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
