I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
