He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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