i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
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