whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize