did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
