Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
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