If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Randomize