and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Randomize
