at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
