Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
