apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
