Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
