I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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