She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Randomize