Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
