this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize
