I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
