She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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