remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
