life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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