we're blogging at a bar
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
