Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
