Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
