How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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