There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
