I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
This girl is more easily done than said...
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
