her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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