Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
