The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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