And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
We're too hungover to prance.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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