I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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