scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
