So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
