i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize