i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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