You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
