you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Randomize
