bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize