Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
